Let's talk about Palm Heights

My official review of Palm Heights, Grand Cayman 🌴🍌🥥🌞

If you don’t like reading about what eden might be like, skip this letter.

There was a moment two weeks ago when I was sitting by an empty, grand pool on a sunny 85-degree day in Grand Cayman when Bambi, Palm Heights’ master of ceremonies, came up to me and my friend Gaby. He immediately started speaking as if we were picking up where we left off in a conversation, maybe in a past life or on a drunken night hours before, but we had never met.

After asking us if we wanted a watermelon juice, Bambi said, “Almost everyone who comes here is searching for something. It’s my job, by the end of their trip, to help them realize that they just need to connect with themselves. These girls come here and think they need outfits and a full face of makeup, that’s not what this place is about.”

We chatted for a few more minutes and then he seemed to have vanished away into the sunshine. I later looked up an interview where Bambi said, “The only way to describe me is as a mythological creature.” If I had taken an edible that morning, I’d think we were all in the first scene of a sumptuous Luis Buñuel remake. I later learned mythological creatures run the whole show here.

My trip to Palm Heights really began in January when I wrote this. Since I wrote that newsletter, WSJ published this photo-filled essay about the resort, Hailey Bieber posed on the cover of GQ at the hotel, Pamela Anderson shot a bikini campaign there, Marni also shot a bikini campaign there, Bella Hadid and friends stayed there…. you get what I’m saying, right? It’s a very good year from Palm Heights.

This is where I tell you that the hotel’s PR team reached out to me to come visit the property to go deeper on my reporting. And deeper I went. 🥥

The boutique hotel opened in 2019. The design is ridiculously fabulous. It’s inspired by 70’s beach houses, and all the rooms and hallways are filled with incredible artwork from Ettore Sottass, Mario Bellini and Ingo Maurer. It’s small, 52-rooms (all of them are suites!! all of them have views of the ocean!!). The flight from New York is less than 4 hours, and there is usually only one a day (I learned this the hard way, I will not be elaborating on it) from NYC. The property is laser-focused on wellness and culture — when I was there I saw several celebrities who love both of these things, but I am going to respect their privacy and not mention them.

There does seem to be some sunrise, hazy magic over the whole property. I don’t know of many hotels that people in my circles whisper about (not even Chateau Marmont, not even The Bowery — you can go to those places, take a photo of your $40 omelette, and get on with your life). The property also has this elusive lore and story around it, like Vacation Sunscreen or Rochambaeu Club, but you can actually live in this world, if only for a few days. The palm trees tower over the entire property. Everything feels quite sexy, even steamy, from 11am on. Every hour I spent there, I wondered why I had only been to the Caribbean once.

Some things that surprised me about Palm Heights:

• When we arrived there was a pineapple filled with fruit and a pitcher of watermelon juice (photo on top of this letter), vegan gluten-free cookies, and a sweet note from the team. I know this happens a lot, but I didn’t grow up traveling (my family spent the summer here for 20 years though) so it always makes me feel so special — I don’t think these little things get old.

• One night while we were getting ready to go to dinner, there was a knock on the door. They were dropping off big, cozy sweatsuits and socks. I wore them on the plane to keep me cozy during my comedown.

• When you check in, they give you a drink immediately which is heaven after flying.

• The massage…

• Those chairs were better than they looked on Instagram. That WSJ story I mentioned had a line that read, “Los Angeles’s Sunset Tower has its gauzy pink curtains, and the deep red exterior of Positano’s Le Sirenuse is a social-media staple. But in the case of Palm Heights, it’s the hotel’s yellow beach umbrellas and matching striped towels.” The towels on them were soft and thick, the beach bartenders’ ratio of “how can I help you?” : leaving you alone was perfect

• Many of the spa facilities were included — cold plunge, sauna, mineral bath. Many hotels I’ve been to charge for these.

• The sunsets. Jeeeez.

• How un-self-conscious I felt! I hate going to fancy places where I feel like I need to impress people/put on some kind of front.

• They have so much programming on the property. Movie nights, parties (hosted by Bambi…), they have high tea in a new tea room.

• The food! All of the restaurants were truly incredible.

Gaby and I on the famous chairs. I miss it so much.

Some design aspects of the hotel that I liked:

• The little snow cave in the cold plunge room

• The repeating glass yellow lamps around the beach bar

• The cheetah coaster that one of the bars gave me with my coffee every morning. I think I’m going to frame it actually. I want to start doing stuff like that.

• The tented ceilings at the beach bar. It reminds me of the one at Guild Hall in East Hampton but… tropical.

• I really liked all of their printed materials. The gym had different branding than the pizza and gyro place, which had different branding than the Italian party night, and the tea room. It added this extra layer of discovery and novelty within the walls of the hotel property. I took a bunch home because they made me happy.

Me being a freak on the roof.

Is it worth it at full-price?

I don’t know your vacation budget. I’ve stayed in hotels in Newport, Rhode Island that cost the same amount as a room at Palm Heights (around $1k/night) and I’d probably go back to Grand Cayman before Rhode Island. It kind of took the same amount of time and money the same to get there now that I think about it…

As I said earlier in this letter, I didn’t grow up traveling. I wouldn’t blow your savings on the hotel, because I wouldn’t blow your savings on any hotel. But it was 10/10 glamorous, 10/10 service, 10/10 food, 10/10 robes, and 10/10 beds. I can confidently say I will go back. My only complaint was that room service didn’t replace the milk in the mini fridge for my coffee.

If you like labyrinths, and magic, and secrets, and luxury, and sunsets, and piña coladas, and massively plus beds (that come with pillow menus), you will like Palm Heights.

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SOME NEWS:

• I got a reader tip that the founder of Daily Harvest was fired. You probably remember their fiasco last year when hundreds of customers “were poisoned” from the prepared smoothie and frozen food brand. In her resignation email to investors, founder Rachel Driori wrote that “In conjunction with focusing on my own health, I need to focus on the health of the Daily Harvest community in a different way.” Different way = outside of the company, in this case. The company’s chief supply chain officer Ricky Silver (formerly PepsiCo and VitaCoco) was promoted to the role of president.

• Maybe we should talk about the Sid Mashburn store. A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of visiting Sid Mashburn and I had so many flashbacks to being a little girl at Brooks Brothers or Mitchell’s, being offered a glass bottle of coat while my dad took houuuuuurs to try on shirts and jackets. Maybe not hours, but it felt like that. The point is, what stuck was that I was somewhere special and my dad was being cared about by someone other than his regular tailor (my Italian great grandmother). Earlier this year, Sid Mashburn opened a store on Madison Avenue. Before Madison Avenue, Mashburn had already opened stores in Atlanta, Dallas, Houston, Los Angeles (currently men’s wear only) and Washington, D.C., each with “a proven track record,” said Chip Ervin, the owner of Grady Ervin & Co., a shop in Charleston, S.C., which stocks the brand’s men’s wear. “The logical extension was New York.” It’s a really lovely retail experience, I suggest you go.

sidmashburn

A post shared by @sidmashburn

• Elon Musk is so fucking dumb sometimes lol. Yesterday, at The Times’ DealBook Summit hosted by Andrew Ross Sorkin, the X owner told advertisers, “Don’t advertise,” and “Go fuck yourself.” Pretty weird considreing that’s how X… makes money. He also kept calling Sorkin “Jonathan” which I couldn’t stop laughing at.

• Should smoking still be allowed in casinos? Yes, next question.

💐👃😊🌸👌😌 EMILY’S FRAGRANCE CORNER 💐👃😊🌸👌😌

• Another story about vanilla’s popularity. 🍨 A few weeks ago we discussed this T Magazine story about vanilla. Today, WSJ published a story about how vanilla is actually the ingredient behind some of the most popular fragrances of the moment. There’s an inherent paradox to vanilla: One of the world’s most rarefied spices, it has also become shorthand for blandness in everything from food to sex. Within the fragrance world, it’s generally associated with body sprays from Victoria’s Secret rather than a high-end perfume counter. However, DS and Durga, Boy Smells, and Byredo have been selling their sophisticated vanilla fragrances quite well. Tom Ford is launching a scent called Vanilla Sex (something I don’t want to have) on December 20th .

@paulreactss@Jade this new vanilla tom ford… #tomfordbeauty #tomfordfragrance #tomfordvanilla #vanillaperfume #gourmandperfume #greenscreen

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• Why are women gatekeeping their perfumes? My professor brought this story up last night (soft launch that I’m in school) and it brought back a lot of memories from when I was younger and people would ask my mom her perfume or hair stylist or whatever. When women don’t disclose where they’re getting work done or where they’re buying things or whatever, it’s not a bad thing, it’s a power move. On TikTok, the phrase “gatekeeping my perfume” has 32.7 million views and counting. A quick scroll serves up videos in which perfume lovers are reluctant to divulge the name of their signature scent, while a handful of others question the notion of keeping it under wraps. Pia Long, perfumer and cofounder of unique fragrance supplier and consultancy, Olfiction Limited, says that all aspects of our lives are exposed and scrutinized, particularly in the age of social media. It’s little wonder, then, that many of us want to keep some mystery. “As a perfumer, I should be advocating for people to shout from the rooftops about their perfume,” says Long, “but I totally respect people’s right not to broadcast their personal scent choice online or even in person.” I love this and think it’s FINE to keep some secrets, I’m a big secret and privacy advocate.

• Soap 🧼 news (I know this isn’t technically fragrance, but she can stay) :

  

  • Soft Services launched a mini bar. The Mini Buffing Bar is a “new tiny marvel, standing at 2 inches tall.” Available this holiday season as a complimentary gift with orders above $75— while our limited supply lasts. Automatically added to your cart, no code needed.

  • Miss Dior launched a beautiful pink soap that looks like it came from Priscilla Presley’s bathtub.

• As fragrance sales surge in 2023, there are new category regulations coming in 2024.

💐👃😊🌸👌😌 END OF EMILY’S FRAGRANCE CORNER 💐👃😊🌸👌😌

• Jezebel has been acquired. Paste Magazine, a music and culture outlet, acquired Jezebel on Tuesday and planned to start publishing on the site again as soon as Wednesday, said Josh Jackson, a co-founder and the editor in chief of Paste. Mr. Jackson said his hope for Jezebel was “to bring all of the best things from all of the eras” of the website. He referred to its original tagline (“Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth.”) and said one of the first things he wanted to bring back was “with teeth.” Hell yeah.

• Vacation sunscreen announced that they’re launching a new product… in 2024. I miss tension and suspense in marketing, so this was intriguing to me. Click the link! This project looks really well done. The beloved sun-care brand Vacation announced a multi-month build-up to the release of their new product, a reformulation of the cult beauty favorite Orange Gelée tanning gel. Why is Vacation confident it can hold our attention for so long? Partly because Orange Gelée has a built-in audience of devotees. First created by Bain de Soleil in 1925 to serve France’s nouveau beach set, the tanning gel went extinct in 2019, setting off a serious hoarding spree among fans. Copycat products like Carroten tried to fill the void; an eBay black market for the original commands about $350 a tube. A Change.org petition for its return has over 10,000 signatures, and even the New York Post has decried its demise.

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A post shared by @vacationinc

• The millennial-pink angle of this mortadella story makes me a little sick. Apparently there’s a mortadella resurgence in America, to which I say there’s a full-on charcuterie resurgence. I rarely open TikTok or Instagram without seeing a board overflowing with meat and cheese at some point. Top-quality imported mortadella has returned, and the nose-to-tail movement has deepened Americans’ curiosity about cured meats like French charcuterie and Italian salumi. Some chefs are even making it themselves. With help from the European Union’s labeling laws and the rise of Instagram and TikTok (and their endless charcuterie boards), mortadella is getting a second act in America.

• Emily’s new letter is out! She’s the consumer news GOAT.

• Emilia took Alison Roman shopping. Super fun series.